BEN SEANOR
BEN SEANOR
Today Is My Birthday
I want a field embraceable
as a golden-doodle.
I want to walk into a room and know
a bowl of cool
red pears wants to touch me.
To look down at my shadow
and see a marathon
of hellebore. Any little moment
can crown me
the good thing. A drawer
with only three old quarters,
a gang of pine needle
corpses, someone
never calling; absence
knocks and how could I not answer?
And if I cannot be the good thing,
let me at least be attendant
to what coaxes the light inside
onto someone’s outside:
I smell dogwood in the air
conditioning; I watch leaves shift,
repeated across a wall
of tv screens; I try to tell
the woman next to me
playing the video game demo
how to move herself
somewhere actual-
ly interesting, but she wants
to stay right here, pushing
the pixel boy
on his pixel swing.
When the boy was alive,
she says, he loved the real
ducks whose sounds
the speakers loop for us.
The Local Situation
We should talk about why
you laid down so easily
when the bullet
sleepwalked through your mass
like a corridor of night.
It is cold and it is morning,
but that isn’t it. No,
this is what it means to forget:
to make her chili, my friend
watches her husband skin you.
She makes sure
he treats you right,
so you can slip inside them
and keep them up at night,
kicking acid up at their throats.
At first you fell like the earth
body-checked you,
but that didn’t stop you
breathing. Did you forget
this is how a life ends?
I saw you coming
into the yard strapped
to the front of the truck.
Everyone in the house delighted
you opened yourself so completely
to the desires of our world.
You are a treasure.
Lost track of your step
and then your spine.
Only now, pulling the bag
of you from the freezer,
do I remember how it is
I can miss you, a bit
of velvet rubbed
onto the mind.
Disintegrating, I Move Toward the Heat
It’s this body.
I can at least tell you
that. The sky moves
behind the wind.
Rain and the night
make the window
almost
a mirror. Every
absence reveals
its meaning,
slowly and only
to you. Yellow
roses exhaling
wide above
a vase of its own
muckwater. Why
do you believe your body
can betray you?
Yes, I always
could be touched.
Ben Seanor is in America.